What’s the best way to handle unwanted advice?
Lately i seem to be having the problem of conversations or what think are intellectual exchanges turning into condecending advice giving. I really dont want to turn these people into enemies yet their unwanted and unsolicited advice is more draining than it is helpful. I think that due to my open personality people are assuming that i am not informed, not intelligent enough or simply naive. Or it could be the need for them to feel important even with subjects that i am well informed about and i am somehow sparking a need for them to become competitive with me. What am i doing wrong? What’s going one here? How can i best deal with this dilema?
Just say thanks, I’ll figure it out and then change the subject.
write down all the things that bother you and throw it in the trash.
Tell them you appriciate their imput but, You can take care of the major issue at hand.
The best way to handle bad advice is to tell the person that you just can’t possibly use it. You will have to be polite about it, but you have got to let them know. I know plenty of people with that personality, and the best way to handle it is to tell them straight out. I would say, Thank you for the advice you have given me, but it just isn’t going to work! You have been so nice trying to help, but I think I can handle this on my own. That is all you have to do
Grow a backbone and stop whining about problems. People probably think they need to give you advice because your always asking for advice (this post for example). Hey, I’m giving you advice……ask for less advice.
all advice is worth hearing, there will always be good advice, and bad advice, some times the way we talk to some one sends them the message we want advice, and as advice is free, most people will give it to you. Best to take what you need and throw out the ones you don’t. have a great day
You must be telling people about your problems and they want to help. If you find it draining and non helpful, stop talking about personal problems with them.
Raise your eyebrows, pause, and say, Interesting. I’ll give that some thought. Or, Interesting point of view. No need to challenge anyone’s opinions if they’re driving you crazy. Take what you find useful from what people say and leave the rest behind. Trying to get someone to swing around to your way of reasoning is just being argumentative. An intellectual exchange of ideas is about offering what you think and listening to what others think. If you pick up something new for yourself, great. If you didn’t, maybe they did.
Hey Jas, I’m like you to open, but out of a sense of survival I had to learn to close down. I didn’t want to but had to in order to maintain my sanity and any friends. The down side is I’ve become sarcastic and even crude, it’s self defense my counselor said. I don’t know whether I like veiled sarcasm or blatant better?